« Hmmm ... | Main | BUFFALO HUNTER in the News »

November 10, 2005

Random Thoughts

1. The so called 'War on Terror' is really an epic battle between Islam and the rest of the world. For various reasons, the world does not grasp that simple concept. The United States is trying to conduct this fight in a vacuum, while desperately wishing not to offend the 'sensiblilties' of those who insist all war is wrong, which is the rest of the world. I have a few ideas.

a. Obliterate Mecca, Medina and the nuclear sites in Tehran.

b. Give Pakistan exactly 1 week to capture Osama Bin Laden or prove he's dead. Failing that - nuke Islamabad.

c. Put 6 Trident submarines under Israeli control immediately.

d. Deploy 2 CTG (carrier taskforce groups) to the Straights of Molucca and put them under Indian control.

   That should take of the 'war on terror'.

2. China is a problem. It is causing trouble for Japan and is drowning us in our own materialism. Taiwan will be a battlefield sooner than later. More than likely, China will be its own destruction from internal pressures. Just in case that doesn't happen soon enough ...

a. Stop all imports from China.

b. Disavow all financial holdings of China in this country.

c. Put 3 Trident submarines under the control of the Taiwanese.

d. Destroy every oil pipeline in China.

3. Internal squabbling within our own borders is becoming a bit ... troublesome. Political correctness, personal attack as an accepted form of seeking office, and The Left are anathemas to our existence.

a. Put a cap on civil suits of $250,000.

b. Mandate that civil institutions AND their employees be liable in criminal and civil courts for malfeasance.

c. Require 'national service' from ALL citizens BEFORE they are granted the rights to vote, attend higher education, own property or obtain a drivers license.

4. The situation on our southern border is untenable. Already, there are some 20 million illegal immigrants here and 1 million more crossing every year.

a. Build a wall from San Diego to Brownsville. Mine it.

b. Give the illegals already in this country exactly 3 months to file for a green card. Any person found WITHOUT proper documentation after that will be deported immediately. To France.

c. Require a minimum sentence of 10 years for any employer caught using undocumented employees.

5. Disband the IRS, institute a consumption tax of 10% and eliminate all deductions. Any change to that rate would require a constitutional amendment.

6. Violent crime is a problem. Impose the death penalty on all crimes committed with a weapon and mandate that sentence be carried out within 1 year.

   There are a few more things that should be done. Sew Bill Clinton's lips shut, hang Jimmy Carter, convert the UN building into condos, suffocate Eleanor Clift, BBQ Michael Moore, perform a tracheotomy on Barbra Steisand, nuke Caracas and find out where George Soros lives. Stop making pennies, give the USPS to UPS, require English be spoken, annex Canada and relocate the population of Quebec to San Francisco, require all persons having obtained citizenship have personal access to a computer and carry a firearm at all times, impose a $0.25 tax on every emoticon used, ban white sugar, and make the usage of the words 'conflicted', 'dissed' and saying 'that's a good question' a capital crime.

                      Yeah, that should do it. I feel better now.

November 10, 2005 in Personal | Permalink

TrackBack

TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://www.typepad.com/t/trackback/3618441

Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Random Thoughts:

» Sew Bill Clinton's Lips Shut...Hang Jimmy Carter... from Daily Pundit
Steel Turman explains how to fix everything. I may think some of this is over the top, but in my... [Read More]

Tracked on Nov 10, 2005 1:01:10 PM

Comments

Gosh, you had me there until you mentioned annexing Canada!

Who in the hell wants 'em?

Posted by: Teach | Nov 10, 2005 4:22:27 AM

Oh I don't know, most Canadians are okay. Sorta like Minnesotans without the attitude. Eh?

Quebec? Well now I think the 'frenchness' of them would fit right in, in San Francisco.

I'm scratching my head here wondering if there are any Greeks causing us grief.

Better not be.

Posted by: Steel | Nov 10, 2005 5:15:10 AM

Ummmm....I guess I owe .50 for the 2 emoticons I used in my latest e-mail to Phoenix then.

Posted by: imp | Nov 10, 2005 7:20:30 AM

Oh imp,

I think people who use emoticons with intent should be exempt.

It is those people who just throw them on that piss me off.

Many fine examples of this can be found at THAT WEBSITE THAT SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS. (bmews).

Posted by: Steel | Nov 10, 2005 7:27:49 AM

OH goody. :)

1. You forgot Indonesia. How about transferring all those people from Quebec down there. The humidity will kill them but not before they hire all the locals who are poor to be their servants. This will give the locals a boost and the resultant mixed-births will create a new society of effetes who don't mind humidity and will work to maintain individual rights. These secular capitalists will not tolerate the radical Muslims and they will eventually see making money and enjoying prosperity beats hiding in the jungle and killing people. This is a psy-ops solution.

2. China. I can't go for three of your solutions. But giving Taiwan the subs is cool. How about we liberate Nepal and set up a military base there? That will be as effective as the one we're going to set up in Iraq - which is the reason we went there. You can't 'disavow' their financial holdings here or anywhere. That just means you ignore them. Better - set up a system that will instantly freeze all their assets if it becomes necessary.

3. I like this one. Add that public institutions accepting federal monies hire only independents - especially in the college/university system, and cut off every penny of aid if a military recruiter is not allowed on campus. I gather that by 'malfeasance' you mean whining, as well. I'll add that campaigns must be kept to a three-week timetable and that political conventions be outlawed. What a waste of money.

4. 5. 6. Good.

Add the phrase: "Having said that..." to the list of capital-crime phrases. Did you want to do anything to Susan Estrich? Cut Jesse Jackson's lips off. You can't understand him with lips, so maybe that's doing him a favor. Send Charlie Rangel to France to live. They have reality checks there that he can identify with.

That website with the emoticons? Shewee.... embarrassing to see grown men actually toy with those asinine things. My god.

Posted by: Phoenix | Nov 10, 2005 3:23:45 PM

You got one major one wrong:

"convert the UN building into condos"

The building's too far gone for that. Have to tear it down and start over.

Posted by: Joe Bonforte | Nov 10, 2005 4:22:52 PM

Sacre bleu, mon dzie anglaise! The Quebecois could not afford to live in San Francisco. Move them into the UN condos.

Posted by: Mouse | Nov 10, 2005 7:25:51 PM

HA HA... Mouse.... hahaha... Hey, maybe they could be street people in SF. Man, that's a whole lot of street people..... But, oh... I don't think NYC wants them wandering around Manhattan. Manhattanites can be a surly bunch if their alpha status is invaded,...and you know the Quebecois see themselves as Top Dog Alphas. Not a good mix.


Posted by: Phoenix | Nov 11, 2005 6:34:41 AM

I have another phrase for the Criminal Phrase List: African-American.

Get rid of that moronic, PC phrase, for crying out loud. Puhleeeeze....


I want to be referred to as Phoenix, a White Anglo Saxon Former Protestant. That would be a WASFP. Example:

"Amy Byrd, White-Anglo-Saxon-Former-Prostestant, woke up this morning and drank coffee and read two news magazines and pulled a tick off her cat, Lydia. Byrd, WASFP, marveled that the weather, no doubt a result of global warming, was so warm in November that ticks remain an issue."

Posted by: Phoenix | Nov 11, 2005 6:42:13 AM

Post a comment